Toast

          Toast

  Jonathan Miller

            Edward Thompson always said that the most important part of any breakfast was the toast.  Without it all you would have is coffee and eggs and really, who wants that?  Edward prepared his breakfast on this particular day dressed in his finest black slacks and a rented dress coat his mother had picked out for him.  His brown hair was slicked back with a slab of grease and he was sporting his finest aftershave.  
         

   Normally he’d be cooking for two, but Julie had woken up before him and left, not to be seen again until the ceremony later that afternoon.  Edward fried his eggs and warmed the coffee, and then turned his attention to the toaster, a small white box with a plastic lever.  He methodically placed a slice of bread into each slot and pressed down with a delicate touch.  

As he stood in the kitchen waiting for the toast to rise to a golden brown perfection Edward thought to himself about his wedding.  After years of badgering from his mother he finally decided, or rather she decided, it was time for him to settle down.  It was fine with him really, he was sick of hearing how he was thirty-five and still without a family.   Without a steady job or any ambitions.  He wasn’t sure where his mother got all that.  Working at the local grocer was fine when he was seventeen, what was so bad about it now?

Interrupting his thoughts was a curious smell, the smell of something a little too done.  Edward glanced at the stove, the eggs looked about right.  His eyes then darted to the coffee pot, which had stopped dripping and was ready to be poured.  Finally, they landed on the toaster. Staring back at him were two pieces of what once resembled toast.  At some point these slices of bread were cooking in the toaster.  There was probably a couple seconds where they were cooked to perfection, and then they kept toasting.  Concerned, Edward rushed to the charcoaled remains and quickly removed them.  He placed them on a plate and sat at the kitchen table.  

Contemplating his next move he glanced at the clock and remembered the strict order of events that had been planned out for the day.  Edward fumbled around in his coat pocket and pulled out a folded sheet of paper reading “Wedding Itinerary” scribbled in his mother’s handwriting.  It was a bulleted list of the day’s agenda.  On it were short descriptions of everything that had to be done.  Glancing down he noticed he had already missed bullet number one:

“10:00 AM – Brunch at the Waffle House.  Don’t be late Edward!”  The words “Don’t be late” were furiously underlined in red.

  Annoyed, Edward folded the paper and placed it back in his coat, returning his attention to the most important part of any breakfast.  He glanced at the clock and figured he’d already missed the brunch.  That gave him another couple of hours before he was to recite his “I do’s”.  He stood up and walked over to the pantry and pulled out a fresh loaf of bread.  Edward turned the dial on the toaster down to the lowest setting, making sure his toast would come out correctly.  

As he placed two more slices of bread into the toaster Edward again stood in his kitchen waiting for them to rise.  In his pocket his phone began to ring.  He flipped it open and answered.  On the other end was his mother.

      

      “Eddie where are you? Are you ok?” She said in her shrill, high-pitched voice.
            

“Hey ma, I’m fine, I slept in is all.  Sorry I missed breakfast”
        

    “Brunch Edward, it’s called brunch,” His mother explained with a hint of concern and annoyance.  “Didn’t you even read the itinerary I wrote for you?”
          

  He slipped his hand in his pocket and felt the paper.  “Yeah Ma, it’s right here.  Look I’m sorry, something came up and I wasn’t able to make it.  I meant to call you, it’s just I’ve been so busy this morning, what with the wedding and all.”
          

  His mother’s voice softened. “I’m sorry dear, you know how important this day is for you.  And for me as well, my baby boy is finally getting married.”
            

Edward stiffened and he felt a pain in his stomach.  
         

   She continued, “Anyways, I was just calling to make sure everything was ok.  Don’t forget, be at Sunnyside no later than –“
           

“Two, I got it ma.  Like I said, I have your schedule right here.  Don’t worry, I’ll be there.”
       

     “That’s my boy, don’t be late.  You don’t want to keep your bride-to-be waiting. Julie is such a sweet girl.”
        

    Edward hung up the phone just as he heard that familiar snap from the counter.  Smoke was curling up from the toaster, and once again Edward was left with nothing but burnt remains.   As he walked to the counter Edward became even more concerned.  He folded his arms and stared intently at the small white box.  A bead of sweat slid down from his forehead.
          

  “Goddamnit. Piece of shit toaster,” Edward mumbled to himself as he let out a long deep sigh.

He trudged back to the counter and proceeded to cook slice after slice.   Soon, his eggs hardened and his coffee cooled.  The clock continued to tick, not caring about its owner’s predicament.  An hour later, after the entire loaf had been destroyed he sat at his table and came to a sad, terrifying conclusion.  The toaster was broken and he was to get married on an empty stomach.  

Unfolding the itinerary Edward looked down and saw he was running late for bullet number two:

            “12:00 PM – Leave for Sunnyside.  Easy on the aftershave.”
         

   Picture a place where couples and their families go to get away from it all, a quiet countryside far from the city.  Now fill in the blanks with white folding chairs and bouquets of roses.  Add a few relatives here and there and a grilled chicken dinner.  Voila, one has a wedding.  It wasn’t Edward’s ideal location, he would’ve rather just gone to the courthouse and been done with it.  But his mother insisted they have something traditional, and came across Sunnyside in the local newspaper.
        

    Defeated, Edward left the kitchen and grabbed his keys.  He glanced in the bathroom mirror hastily making sure he looked presentable before leaving the house.  His mother wanted to ride with him to Sunnyside, but Edward convinced her that a man should have some time alone before his big day.  He would be meeting her when he arrived at the wedding.  
       

     It was a warm, bright day as Edward got in his car and started the engine.  He drove through the city, taking his time as he passed tall buildings and busy streets.  His stomach grumbled and the toast hung on every thought.  It felt strange, getting married today.  It seemed like any other day, nothing special or out of the ordinary.  Edward wasn’t nervous or anxious, or happy or excited. He was, as some would say, indifferent.

Soon, the tall buildings were replaced with lines of trees, and the busy streets transformed into secluded roads.  Edward’s thoughts shifted to his mother, and he again felt a pain in his stomach.  It was fine with him, really, how she set him and Julie up.  That first blind date went well enough, despite the constant calls from her wondering how everything was going.   He could even stand the daily inquiries of a proposal.  Sure, they went on for a few years, but it was only a bother a few minutes every morning.  But today Edward had an empty stomach and a broken toaster.  And instead of resolving the matter at hand, he was forced to attend a wedding.  This was, to him, more than a slight annoyance.

As he pulled up to Sunnyside and got out of his car, Edward glanced around.  There were a number of cars parked in the lot, one of them being his mother’s.  He walked up to the tent that had been set up for the reception and looked outside to the left.  He could see the guests already sitting, waiting for the wedding to begin.  Unfolding the itinerary once more Edward glanced down at bullet number 3:

            “2:00 PM – Clean yourself up and take a stand at the front, just as we rehearsed.  Don’t forget the ring!”

“Edward there you are!” His mother said as she waddled up from the tent.  “I was worried you’d gotten lost again.”

            Startled, he quickly stuffed the paper into his pocket. “Hey ma, traffic was a mess.  Anyways, I was just gonna duck inside real quick before I had to go up there.”  
       

     His mother walked up to him and took him by the hand. “Yes Eddie, we’d better get you inside, you’re a mess.  And what did I say about the aftershave?  You know, sometimes I swear you just don’t listen.”
            

They both trudged inside the tent and into the dressing room that had been set up.  With a damp handkerchief his mother wiped down Edward’s face.  She then fixed his hair and straightened his coat.  

As they exited the dressing room and headed towards the ceremony they passed a large round table.  On it sat a photo of Edward and Julie, holding each other and staring lovingly into the camera.  Next to the picture a sign stood reading, “In Celebration of Mr. and Mrs. Thompson.”  Scattered around the table were neatly wrapped gifts the guests had brought.  One of them caught Edward’s eye and forced him to stop.  

            “Eddie, what are you doing?  Everyone’s waiting.”
          

  Edward pulled his hand from his mother and walked over to the table in a daze.  He pushed the gifts aside and picked up a large square box.  It was wrapped in red and tied with a bow.  It weighed about right, not too heavy, not too light.  He placed his ear to the box and gently shook it.  A quiet rattle rose from beneath the wrapping paper and visions of toast danced in his head.
          

  Laughing, his mother said, “That’s just like you, can’t wait to open your presents.  There’ll be time for that later.”  She walked over to Edward and grabbed his hand.
         

   Edward took the gift under his arm and awkwardly began to walk again. “Yeah, right, later,” he said as if in a dream.  
        

    “Would you put that down, no need for that now.”
        

    He clutched the box like a boy holding a toy.  “No ma, please, I’m gonna hang on to this one.”  His voice rose.
        

    “Nonsense, give me that.  This is no time to be fooling around with gifts,” his mother said as she grabbed the box from underneath Edwards arm.  She threw it back on the table and it landed with a thud.   “Now hurry up and get to the front, Julie will be out here any minute.”  His mother nudged him towards the ceremony.
         

   He began to walk again, but his stomach growled and it caused him to stop.  
           

“No.  I won’t,” Edward said, “I’m hungry and I need my toast.”
        

    His mother stopped with a puzzled look on her face. “Well, serves you right. You missed the brunch this morning.  If a man can’t keep track of simple appointments, he has no right eatin’ a breakfast anyways.” His mother huffed and tried to pull Edward along, but he stood, firm as a rock.  
         

   “You don’t understand ma, toast is the most important part of any breakfast.  And you always told me you can’t start a day without a good breakfast,” he said without a waiver as he walked back to the table and retrieved the red box.  A smile spread across his face as he turned and began walking back to the parking lot, gift in hand.  

His mother stared in disbelief,  “Where do you think you’re going?  Edward Thompson you get back here this instant!”

“Can’t do it ma, not this time.  I’m goin’ home and makin’ breakfast,” he said as he quickly walked to his car.

His mother, realizing what was going on, rushed in front of him and blocked his way.  “You’re not going anywhere.  I worked so hard for this day and I’m not letting you take it away from me,” her eyes full of fire.

       

     A crowd began to walk up from the ceremony as they noticed what was going on.  Whispers could be heard from the group.  Out of the corner of his eye Edward saw Julie standing in her wedding dress.  Her expressionless face was scanning the situation.
          

  “And what about her Edward,” she motioned towards Julie, “Don’t you love her?!”
          

  Edward locked eyes with Julie and for an instant he waivered.  He stared at her for what felt like forever and then turned to his mother.
         

   “I love toast,” he said as he got in his car and started the engine.   
       

     His mother ran towards the car and banged on the window.  Edward began to drive away, leaving her screaming in his rearview mirror.    

He drove off back down the road, leaving behind the wedding, and his mother, and Julie.  As he drove, secluded roads turned to busy streets, and lines of trees were replaced with tall buildings.  The entire time Edward felt his phone ringing in his pocket.  He had no interest in ever picking it up.   

The sun was low in the sky as Edward returned home.  With the gift in hand he entered his house and went straight to the kitchen.  The eggs sat on the stove, cold and uneaten.  The coffee was still in the pot waiting to be poured.  Edward sat at the kitchen table and unwrapped the gift.  In front of him stood a box with a beautiful stainless steel toaster on the cover.  It had a black rubber lever and four individual slots.  

His heart skipped a beat as he opened it up and took out the toaster.  Without thinking he went to the pantry and retrieved a fresh loaf of bread.  Edward plugged in the toaster and placed four slices into the new appliance.  As the toast cooked he took the eggs off the stove and poured himself a cup of old, cold coffee.  Soon, the toast rose and out came four slices, perfectly cooked and golden brown.  

Edward placed the toast, eggs, and coffee at the table and sat down, exhausted from the day’s events.  Before eating he felt around in his pockets for the itinerary.  He looked down and read the final bullet on the list:

“5:00 PM – Say a toast in celebration of this beautiful day.  Make it short and don’t ramble on.”

Edward crumpled the paper and tossed it across the table.  He raised his coffee and toasted the air.  He took a bite of his breakfast and it crunched that perfect crunch.  He was content.